Chapter 7: Revising Supporting Evidence (The Fourth Draft)

Overview

In Chapter 6: Revising Topic Sentences, you learned the importance of evaluating topic sentence statements to ensure they support the purpose of the thesis. Chapter 6 introduced the comment “Stick With the Topic.” This comment ideally provides tips to help you maintain the tone and direction of your thesis and the paper as a whole. A paper that fully reflects the instruction (i.e., essay prompt) is a paper that “sticks with the topic,” theoretically.

How you construct the topic sentences will have a significant impact on the supporting evidence. If there are vague statements in the topic sentences, you can expect to see this also in the evidence you use to support your thesis. If one or more topic sentences contradict each other, then you can expect that the supporting evidence of one body paragraph will also contradict the supporting evidence of another. If a topic sentence contradicts the thesis, then your paper fails to provide a sound assessment of the topic.

Chapter 7: Revising Supporting Evidence is a chapter that extends the discussion of helping students correct sentences for purpose. In the same way that the essay prompt serves as an instruction, the thesis also reflects this concept. For example, the thesis instructs the topic sentences, which in turn instruct the supporting evidence. The instruction includes information about what to do and how to provide details for other sentences within the paper. In other words, the topic sentences instruct the supporting evidence on which sentence to support and by default which one not to support.

With this in mind, Chapter 7 provides effective tools to help you revise supporting evidence, which includes quotes, examples, details, and your statements. The chapter offers margin comments to help students revise redundant phrasing, repetition, contradictions, transitions, word choices, and instances of plagiarism.

Chapter 7 offers more sample excerpts, critiques, and revision considerations. A unique feature of Chapter 7 is it provides students with an example of a quote out of context with the topic and the whole paper.

The comment titles below fall under the fourth draft. Click on any one of the links to access content.

Redundant/Redundant Phrasing
Relevance
Rephrase
Rephrase (Not Clear)
Repetition/Repetitious
Revise
Solid
Solid Effort
Specify (Be Specific)
There’s No Indication of This
This Doesn’t Occur
This Doesn’t Occur/Contradiction
This Quote is out of Context
Too General to be Meaningful
Transitions
True
Truncated Statement
Word Choice
Wrong Word
Yes/Ah, Yes, Right, Exactly, True, Check mark
You Are in Danger of Plagiarism
You Don’t Bring in Specifics
Your Ideas Are Too General
You Misquote the Evidence

Copyright 2011 Regina Y. Favors. All Rights Reserved.

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